Bed Tray

Well, I can't think of the right word that can capture the wealth of emotions that we've experienced over the past couple of days. I guess I should start this post off with a disclaimer that reminds everyone that postpartum emotions are pretty strong. SO....

This morning, I woke up to the sweetest thing. I almost cried. I woke up to a hospital tray set up with a diet coke bottle on ice, a milk carton on ice, some cheerios, a spoon, some ice water, my cell phone, my blood sugar meter, and a jello cup. Really, what more could I ask for? Kyle (who has been spending the night at the hospital with me despite my efforts to keep him - and my mom- at home during the night) got up this morning to get to mom and dad's to help pass Vivi (and car seat) off to Jason and Fonda (our good friends...Kyle and Jason have been friends for 25 years) for the morning. But, before he left the hospital, he got a tray situated for me with all the essentials. It was just too sweet. But seeing this tray got my emotions going.

First, it made me sympathetic towards all the strong women I know that are currently pregnant and will have babies while their husbands share cigars with their buddies in a foreign country. If you are reading this, just know that I am so proud of you. Your strength is inspirational.

Second, it made me so grateful to know that my daughter has been taken care of the best possible way while I've been in the hospital and even before, when my 9 pound son was inutero, preventing me from being in my best possible physical condition (for playing with a 2 year old). She was able to participate in a new preschool and have an entire years worth of grandparent playtime. This is on top of all of our Birmingham friends who have offered to take her to dinner, the mall, the zoo, the park, watch her during nap time, while I was at the doctor, bring dinner over for us, take her to the urgent care center, etc. I cannot express how blessed we've been during the past few months with her care and well being.

Third, it made me grateful for all of the helping hands that have been outstretched while I've been in the hospital; either with caring for Vivi, sending flowers to the hospital room, bringing outside food to me, coming to visit, offering to come visit, ooh-ing and ahh-ing over Bryton, offering magazines, company, etc. And all I did was hand the baby over to the doctors, relieving much joyous discomfort. There's nothing to cure a backache like having a 9 lb baby.

Fourth, it made me so sad for all the babies in the NICU who are so tiny, but so loved...and in the best possible place they can be. What a start to life. We are SO fortunate that our son will be able to come home with us soon...I ache for the mothers who will know no touches of their infants other than those through the incubator holes for days, weeks, months longer. I ache for those babies who are conceived to those who don't necessarily want to experience pregnancy and motherhood; and I ache for those who want nothing else but pregnancy and motherhood. My prayers go for those who hurt and my heart rejoices for the babies and mothers that God has matched up in so many ways. Kyle and I will never take for granted how blessed we have been to be able to make it through 2 high risk pregnancies.

God has given us Vivian and Bryton....and to Kyle and I, each other. We could not be better matched. Our marriage is so strong; probably partly in part by Kyle's absences and our moving so much. God has made us depend on each other in so many ways, and even though the suffering isn't nice at the time, it has definitely increased the strength of our marital foundation. Which is why I woke up this morning...to the perfect bed tray.